On Baker campus. It is a year or more since I worked there.
Thinking of Mike B. I pass Mulvane and wonder about the new science center.
Reading a letter of recommendation for me from two professors at Amherst. It is a short letter and both professors contribute to it. One writes "useful because I bike in." The implication is that because I drive I can sometimes give him a ride.
A building in the middle of campus, octagonal floor plan, a dome on top. Large glass windows and doors in a stout wooden frames. It is attached to a newer, larger building. I think it would be cool to live in the wooden building, but decide it would be too small unless I could also live in part of the newer building.
Hungry, walking to the cafeteria. It may be one I have dreamed. I plan to buy a Twix. I wonder how I will be received since it has been some time since I quit working here. Will I even be remembered? It feels like the last day of the semester.
I buy the Twix with a $5 and we have terrible trouble figuring out the change. At one point the cashier gives me a $5 and 60 or 65c back. I tell her it cannot be right.
Talking to a former student who compliments me on the women I sleep with.
Talking to a professor who is not from Baker. He tells me the Science Expansion did not work out and the Doomsday Scenario occurred. He is referring to Physics staffing. I say "Which is where they were before I got here." I feel some guilt at leaving.
I wonder if I would accept the job if offered it. It is not clear if the job is at Baker or a postdoc somewhere. I feel a sense of resignation at accepting a job; it seems to be what is expected.
I get in The Bug and drive away.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Clearing
In the yard. Collecting tomatoes before the first frost. Most are rotting.
Playing soccer with a friend when suddenly half the players fall to the ground. Saying "swish" and waving my arm with a dramatic flourish I knock the remaining players to the ground, with the exception of my friend.
I kick Rufus into a river. I feel bad. He comes back.
Walking to a clearing in a forest with my friend. A crowd of people surrounds a large, geometric indentation a few feet deep in the grass. They are waiting for the spaceship.
Trying to light someone's cigarette. The lighter has plastic film close to the nozzle.
"If gas only used friend can never leave."
Playing soccer with a friend when suddenly half the players fall to the ground. Saying "swish" and waving my arm with a dramatic flourish I knock the remaining players to the ground, with the exception of my friend.
I kick Rufus into a river. I feel bad. He comes back.
Walking to a clearing in a forest with my friend. A crowd of people surrounds a large, geometric indentation a few feet deep in the grass. They are waiting for the spaceship.
Trying to light someone's cigarette. The lighter has plastic film close to the nozzle.
"If gas only used friend can never leave."
Monday, February 1, 2010
Changing Room
Buying a new house with Gina. I do not want to be with her anymore.
Lost in the new neighborhood, first driving then walking. I am looking for landmarks to help me get around. I come across a large building that looks like Flarsheim Hall. The side is all brick except for a couple of doors that look like fire exits. On one door there is a red sign that says "JOB 1."
I walk around the building to the front where there are large glass doors, a carpeted lobby, and a smiling woman behind a reception desk. A large red sign above the doors says "Center for Labour Studies." It appears to be a leftist, pro-labor institute. I think maybe this is somewhere that I could work. This would allow me to move into a house with the woman I love.
On a golf course. An excitable man is putting. The ball rolls up a hill roughly where he wants it, then rolls back down.
In a changing room. Doyle Brunson is there. A naked blonde woman stands with her back to me as she looks into a mirror. She looks over her shoulder at me and smiles.
Lost in the new neighborhood, first driving then walking. I am looking for landmarks to help me get around. I come across a large building that looks like Flarsheim Hall. The side is all brick except for a couple of doors that look like fire exits. On one door there is a red sign that says "JOB 1."
I walk around the building to the front where there are large glass doors, a carpeted lobby, and a smiling woman behind a reception desk. A large red sign above the doors says "Center for Labour Studies." It appears to be a leftist, pro-labor institute. I think maybe this is somewhere that I could work. This would allow me to move into a house with the woman I love.
On a golf course. An excitable man is putting. The ball rolls up a hill roughly where he wants it, then rolls back down.
In a changing room. Doyle Brunson is there. A naked blonde woman stands with her back to me as she looks into a mirror. She looks over her shoulder at me and smiles.
Thoughtless
In a car. A work colleague who has been staying with me for a while is driving.
Driving through countryside to a hill. We walk up the hill and reach a grassy plateau. Friends are there. My visitor has a bag of mushrooms. Someone else has a bottle of wine. I did not know this was a trippy picnic. I do not want to get high and feel I have been left out of the plans. I wonder why people are so inconsiderate towards me.
Driving through countryside to a hill. We walk up the hill and reach a grassy plateau. Friends are there. My visitor has a bag of mushrooms. Someone else has a bottle of wine. I did not know this was a trippy picnic. I do not want to get high and feel I have been left out of the plans. I wonder why people are so inconsiderate towards me.
Office Space
At an academic institution. Alan Cunningham is a professor there. I am quitting my job. There is an issue with my office. One plan is to use it for two female students who are starting next semester, but there is a concern that this may devalue the office making it a poaching target for another department.
Walking down stairs to leave the building. Doug walks up along side me. He talks about the office situation. When we get outside I call him "Schweppe." He says "It's Doug." I say "I know that."
A beautiful woman in a convertible. She parks on the street in front of where I stand and smiles seductively at me twice. I don't recognize her. I realize I am wearing shades and so she cannot see that I am playing eye-tag back.
Walking down stairs to leave the building. Doug walks up along side me. He talks about the office situation. When we get outside I call him "Schweppe." He says "It's Doug." I say "I know that."
A beautiful woman in a convertible. She parks on the street in front of where I stand and smiles seductively at me twice. I don't recognize her. I realize I am wearing shades and so she cannot see that I am playing eye-tag back.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Dying Again
At Fitzjohn Avenue. In the dining room with Jack, Mum and Gaye. It is clear Jack is about to vomit. He leans over the side of his chair and throws up on the floor. Mum watches, but makes no comment.
I go to the kitchen to get a bowl for Jack to puke in. They are all dirty. I start washing the pasta pan, but decide it is too tall and get another.
I have the idea that Jack has already died once and is now dying again.
I suspect Gaye is hurt and annoyed at me because she knows I am glad Jack is dying.
I go to the kitchen to get a bowl for Jack to puke in. They are all dirty. I start washing the pasta pan, but decide it is too tall and get another.
I have the idea that Jack has already died once and is now dying again.
I suspect Gaye is hurt and annoyed at me because she knows I am glad Jack is dying.
Mold
Playing online poker. One of my opponents is a girl who is "a friend for FPPs."
It is the Dating Game.
The girl and I fly together, her on my knee. I am the director of "America's Home Movies." She is flying me away from Vegas because, by court order, Vegas is the only place where I am allowed to film.
In my kitchen. I am putting together the second of two beef pot pies. I am assembling it piece by piece.
The girl says "Single for three years now. You haven't asked me."
The sink in the kitchen is overflowing. I reach for a cloth. Everything is moldy. I say that it is toxic.
A man in a park with a bundle of clothes.
At the end of an online MTT. My stack is dwindling, largely because of an aggressive player who is raising nearly every pot. His screen-name is "Thoughts."
Thoughts is all-in against one opponent on the flop. The opponent has flopped a boat. Thoughts make a bigger boat on the river. Queens full of Jacks.
It is the Dating Game.
The girl and I fly together, her on my knee. I am the director of "America's Home Movies." She is flying me away from Vegas because, by court order, Vegas is the only place where I am allowed to film.
In my kitchen. I am putting together the second of two beef pot pies. I am assembling it piece by piece.
The girl says "Single for three years now. You haven't asked me."
The sink in the kitchen is overflowing. I reach for a cloth. Everything is moldy. I say that it is toxic.
A man in a park with a bundle of clothes.
At the end of an online MTT. My stack is dwindling, largely because of an aggressive player who is raising nearly every pot. His screen-name is "Thoughts."
Thoughts is all-in against one opponent on the flop. The opponent has flopped a boat. Thoughts make a bigger boat on the river. Queens full of Jacks.
Back-seat driver
In a car. My father, Telly Savalas, is driving. A young Richard is there. My age varies.
On vacation, driving along a coastal road to visit a famous house designed by Frank Lloyd Wright. I have dreamed about this house. Or I saw it with Ray in Alabama.
Sulking. Telly stops the car. He has two movie tickets. I know the movie will be violent. I tell him from the back seat of the car that I do not want to see the movie. He gets in the back of the car behind the driver's seat. He makes a big production of the fact that he cannot reach the steering wheel from the back seat, implying I should drive. I ask him why he is being an ass.
On vacation, driving along a coastal road to visit a famous house designed by Frank Lloyd Wright. I have dreamed about this house. Or I saw it with Ray in Alabama.
Sulking. Telly stops the car. He has two movie tickets. I know the movie will be violent. I tell him from the back seat of the car that I do not want to see the movie. He gets in the back of the car behind the driver's seat. He makes a big production of the fact that he cannot reach the steering wheel from the back seat, implying I should drive. I ask him why he is being an ass.
Bookcase
A bookcase in a service elevator. On each shelf is a mix of organic material. The shelves can be slid out so that the material moves downwards to crush the well-rotted compost at the bottom.
Ants
In the yard. I run a youth hostel and Europeans are staying.
Collecting wood to burn in the fireplace. On one piece of wood some fabric has got tangled on a nail. A guest from Oslo tells me his shirt got caught. I tell him he is not the first Scandinavian to get caught up.
Checking the health of the plants. I am about to leave for Vegas. Gina has left a note asking when the plants should be watered.
I write: "If the plants wilt, water them."
I write: "If the ground is dry, water them."
The end of June. I contemplate direct-seeding lettuce and starting some indoors. I conclude whoever waters the yard is unlikely to do it well enough to nurture new seed.
In Vegas on a futon with someone's wife. We are on our backs under a comforter.
We are at a show.
We are on a beach.
To my right is a flight of steps. Showgirls walk up the steps like they have just got off stage. It amuses me that such tall women are walking past when I am laying down since it makes them appear even taller.
Standing by the woman who is sitting. She wears a yellow bikini. A lifeguard comes over and starts to make out with the woman. He stops and points to a mark below her knee. He pokes, then squeezes the mark. Ants crawl out. They are breeding under the woman's skin. The ants get larger until the Mother ant, a snakelike creature the size of a pen, comes out of the woman's leg. The woman seems unconcerned.
Collecting wood to burn in the fireplace. On one piece of wood some fabric has got tangled on a nail. A guest from Oslo tells me his shirt got caught. I tell him he is not the first Scandinavian to get caught up.
Checking the health of the plants. I am about to leave for Vegas. Gina has left a note asking when the plants should be watered.
I write: "If the plants wilt, water them."
I write: "If the ground is dry, water them."
The end of June. I contemplate direct-seeding lettuce and starting some indoors. I conclude whoever waters the yard is unlikely to do it well enough to nurture new seed.
In Vegas on a futon with someone's wife. We are on our backs under a comforter.
We are at a show.
We are on a beach.
To my right is a flight of steps. Showgirls walk up the steps like they have just got off stage. It amuses me that such tall women are walking past when I am laying down since it makes them appear even taller.
Standing by the woman who is sitting. She wears a yellow bikini. A lifeguard comes over and starts to make out with the woman. He stops and points to a mark below her knee. He pokes, then squeezes the mark. Ants crawl out. They are breeding under the woman's skin. The ants get larger until the Mother ant, a snakelike creature the size of a pen, comes out of the woman's leg. The woman seems unconcerned.
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